August 16, 2007

Here I am sitting in the Medan airport waiting for my flight to Aceh… many thing filled my mind… we’ll start from the beginning…

Refuse to wake up when the alarm went off, when I finally forced myself up, mom was already on her way to wake me for the second time… and she told me the taxi man is already waiting, so what else, I rushed to get ready, and hopped into the taxi…

Reaching KLIA, I can’t help but noticed that the airport if filled with flowers, it must be the floral fest again… and the flowers really cheered me… after checking in, I went for my coffee at the usual place and had a bun, man was I hungry?

In the plane, I sat next to this couple… very intimate couple indeed… they were like hugging all the way, never mind, I slept all the way, well, almost all the way…

Reaching Medan, Zainal was waiting… I got my passport stamped, and went to wait for my luggage, remind me not to bring good bags to Indonesia… this is the 2nd time my luggage was damaged in Indonesia… I didn’t bother to complain, it would be a waste of time, so, live with it and when I get home, I have to buy new baggage…

Lately, I have not been happy, with many things, with work, home, people, I was too sensitive with people’s remark… and the yesterday I told Cube about it, she introduced me to the term “separation anxiety”… boy, this is new to me… and she said must be because I missed hubby too much… and I said, ya, but I wasn’t like thinking about him all the time, and she said, it’s not the mind, it’s the body… and she also said, “the mind is logical, the body is emotional” and I was thinking about what she said…

The mind is logical? Not sure, mine was never logical… I am simply this silly gurl who doesn’t waste time thinking… I know, this may sound bizarre to some people, I am a planner, or my profession is a planner, how can I not think? And some of you may think that I am the “organized” person… well, the truth is, I am not, so not… my life is a mess, and the projects are in an irrecoverable state… if I am that good a planner, then perhaps, things will be better…

The body is emotional? Err… not sure too, how is the body emotional? I thought emotions come from feelings… how is it then related to the body?

I am so down lately, everything just don’t seem right, and all this happened after my India trip, and I am starting to believe that I am demon-posessed… nah, just kidding… just that I’ve be reflecting a lot lately, and I looked back at my life, things that I’ve done… and I came to see that I’ve not done anything significant or spectacular… I’ve made bad decisions, hurt some people, and made some enemies along the way… and I guess the person I hurt the most is my dad… I never had the chance to apologize and now, what can I do? Nothing!

It dawned to me that, I may do well in school, not the best student, but always among the best… was in the best class since I can remember… no, don’t get me wrong, I am not trying to boast here… but I failed, big time in life…

Enuff of my soppy stories, I bet you are sound asleep by now… well, lets hope that I have interesting things to say about Acheh… this is not the first time I’m there, so don’t expect a lot… this is my fifth time there, and I am not expecting this trip to be different from the four I’ve had…