My Life after Mom

Today is October 19th, 2017 - 19 days after mom left.

I miss you so much. I am grieving but I am unable to express, because every time I say something, people keep telling me that you won't want to see me sad, I know all that, but I also miss you. So, I guess I will just write my thought down, as I felt that I am going crazy with all these feelings inside.

I keep doing things hoping that I can remember you for a little longer and I am so afraid that one day I will forget. I don't want to forget, I want to remember even if it means it will continue to hurt. I kept your room the way it was, I am hoping that one day you will come back.

I think I will keep this blog to write down what I feel and to tell you things that I usually tell you. We don't talk that much, we are never chit-chatty... mostly we talked about food and the family. I am sorry, I told you I will not keep in touch with the family after you are gone, I lied. I didn't mean it, I hope you know.